The National Directory for the Formation, Ministry, and the Life of Permanent Deacons in the United States (Ascension)

X NDPD 149

Dimensions in the Formation of Deacons

cannot be considered for the diaconate without the consent of his wife. 57 The consent offered by way of a wife’s signature should be reflective of her participation and presence at some level. Otherwise, it cannot be an informed consent. After ordination, a deacon’s wife needs to “be duly informed of [her] husband’s activities in order to arrive at a harmonious balance between family, professional and ecclesial responsibilities.” 58 149 The participation of a wife in her husband’s formation program strength ens their awareness of the husband’s diaconal vocation and helps the wife to accept the challenges and changes that will take place, should her husband be ordained. It also provides an opportunity for those respon sible for diaconal formation to assess whether she has “the Christian moral character and attributes which will neither hinder [her] hus band’s ministry nor be out of keeping with it.” 59 To help the partici pant’s wife to give an informed consent to her husband’s request for ordination, it is necessary to include appropriate resources and program ming addressed to her. Spiritual direction may be made available to her while her husband is in formation. When workshops and spiritual exer cises for wives are planned, wives should be consulted to ascertain their questions and concerns. While every effort ought to be made to provide scheduling and material assistance to make wives’ participation possi ble, care must simultaneously be taken to keep clear the essential dis tinction between ordained and familial life and the clear independence of diaconal ministry. 60 The level of expected participation of the wife in the formation process should consider her responsibilities to family and work. Care also should be extended to those who are recently wid owed—normally, at least three years should elapse prior to acceptance. Those recently married should live their married vocation for five years prior to requesting admittance.

57 58 59 60

CIC, c. 1031 §2. See BNFPD, no. 37.

DMLPD, no. 61. BNFPD, no. 37. DMLPD, no. 81.

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